I'm commited to working in this blog. In sharing the adventures I have as I venture into art, craft, life and healing from the deep scars of severe depression. I'm happy you're here looking and sharing in what is my small world.

Monday, July 18, 2011

Slowly becoming a real person

Has anybody else clung to their online moniker for all it’s worth? Opting not to put a real name on your blog, your log-in IDs for webforums and sites? Even on Facebook? For YEARS I’ve gone around with my Online ID “Chloe” or “LadyChloe” and let my real name slip into oblivion to the online world. Lately though, I’ve been letting the real me seep through more and more. Some of this is deeply personal, as I become more and more “out” in my real life. I’m less afraid of the proverbial boss or co-worker stumbling onto my alter-ego, the “mostly” gay pagan woman who struggles with *gasp* depression. A woman who has a healthy or unhealthy love of fanfiction, erotica, art, Faerie and YARN. A woman who feels censorship isn’t always appropriate and sometimes blurts out exactly what is bothering her…complete with a curse word or two. Maybe my boss will find my blog one day? Aren’t I allowed to have opinions that are diversified from my extremely catholic work place? I don’t “flaunt” it at work. I don’t “hide” it either…not really. I just don’t bring it up or rub it around.

So, here I am. I’m a REAL person. Not a moniker. Not a handle. Not a faceless drone. I’m real. I bleed. I fear. I cry. I have a mess house, a messy life and a messy set of ideals. I’m changing my blog name from “Chloe” to Jennifer. Because Jennifer is the real me. One less step out of hiding.


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