Missive:

I'm commited to working in this blog. In sharing the adventures I have as I venture into art, craft, life and healing from the deep scars of severe depression. I'm happy you're here looking and sharing in what is my small world.



Wednesday, December 15, 2010

"And my dreams it's never quiet as it seems never quiet as it seems..."

~Dreams by The Cranberries

So today I begin a new endeavor, a new blog and a new start. My reasons for starting yet another new blog has everything to do with needing the cathartic effect of posting my struggles online for a bunch of strangers to read over. I need to get it out there, to purge my triumphs and failures as I begin again with trying to make my life what I want it to be.

So what is it I want it to be? Well, I mostly live a simple life. I'm up in the wee hours of the morning everyday where I indulge in a hot bath and a book before getting ready for work. My commute is one hour each way so I spend a lot of the drive time dreaming up ideas, bits and pieces for stories, recipes I'd like to try, little bits of poetry that flit around my brain. At work I'm a "pediatric nurse case manager" for a small medicaide managed care organization. This means I spend 8 hours a day on the phone, trying to walk my members (or rather, their parents) through the pitfalls and hazards of the insurance process. Or to put it a different way, I spent 8 hours a day listening to people complain about their insurance company, whom I represent. I do love my job.I do it for the children, trying to make sure they get everything they need covered and taken care of. But it wears me out. I come each night, around 6:30 and usually fall onto the couch to spend the next several hours watching TV and chatting online with my longtime/long distance girlfriend. It's off to bed early and then up again the next day.

This is what I'd like to "adjust". There's no feasible way for me to be able to stop working. But I'd like to spend my free time in greater pursuits. I've recently started several art journals and I've been known to knit from time to time in the past. I'd like to expand upon that and pursue my artistics endeavors to higher ground. I've purchased the book "The Artists Way" by Julia Cameron recently and I want to start working through it more diligently and to blog about it, here. It's not the only art book I'm following but I'm hoping it will help me expand my spiritual art journey. I'll say it right now, before you all start laughing at the art that I post here: I AM A BEGINNER! I never had the pleasure of taking any art classes in school. I was a band nerd to the core! And while I still love music I find myself now wishing there had been room for fine arts in my education as well. But that is neither here nor there. No time to learn like the present, right? Everything I do is wildly experimental and purely for my own pursuit. It's art for the sake of "art". Be it writing, painting, *gulp* drawin, knitting or cooking (Yes cooking...I'm also dieting so cooking will definately be more creative) I intend to explore it, ponder it and savor every moment of it. I hope to share that journey with DAILY posts (Yes...daily) here for the amusement of anybody who cares to read and comment.

So..here goes nothing!

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